Tag Archives: family

They Were The Reason

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My kids have been such a critical part of this new foundation. They are my strength, my reasons for being, they are the motivation.

When I began having children I didn’t think my weight would ever become a problem. I worked out, I ate right, everything. But, I soon found out that it’s more to having children than just dealing with the physical aspect of growing a baby inside of you. My hormones, stress, lifestyle and mental health along with other things all played a role in my weight journey.

Weight loss didn’t become priority until after my family and I relocated to Orlando.

All of the kids had gotten to an age that required lots of “mommy time”. They wanted to go outside more, they wanted to do more active things and I was never up for the task. Between work, and juggling 4 kids while my husband worked in Miami, things got pretty hectic.

Outside was hot, the playground was far, and I didn’t always want to drive to a park. I felt like it took so much energy from me. I was always so exhausted and I continued to gain weight with no explanation from doctors. Despite me going from a sedentary to an active lifestyle there was no decrease in my weight.

2016

We bought our house and got a backyard. I started off doing pretty good with the new house. We completely gutted the trees in the back… it took weeks. We planted a garden, ripped up and replanted all of the grass and, put a new fence, we kicked ass. My activity levels were crazy high for about a year. That changed nothing!

Here I was thinking that I was going to loose all this weight doing this outdoor work. Yeah….no.

The kids were so thrilled about all the fun things they were going to be able to do. They eventually got a basketball goal, a trampoline, skates, jump ropes , you name it they pretty much had it all. They love the outdoors and that is a trait I know they get from their father.

Anyway, they wanted me to participate in all of their outdoor fun and I hardly ever did. It got to a point where they would be like “Can you come outside and play with us?”, “Can you come jump on the trampoline with us?”, “Can you come ride the bikes with us?” The answer would always be “no” or “go ask your dad”. Eventually It turned into “well, we always ask dad because you never want to come outside with us.” and “we know if we want to watch movies and do chill stuff then we come to you.”

I didn’t want to be that mom. I didn’t want to be boring , not fun, uncool, out of shape. I wanted change. I wanted to prolong my life not waste it away. I wanted to grow with my kids not just watch them from a distance. I didn’t want to grow old and not be able to play with my grandkids. I was ready for something different.

VSG Decision

My children and I share a special bond. The last thing I wanted to think about was life for my children without me. For so many years I was on the rope about having bariatric surgery. I was terrified of the thought of dying on the table. After experiencing multiple health issues with my feet, my back, my uterus, my breathing, my blood pressure etc, I decided to seek help.

When I had my first appointment with my surgeon he asked “Why did I want to have this surgery?” I explained that my health was important to me so that I could be here to experience life with my children. I wanted to eliminate the biggest problem that I saw every time I looked at myself. Which turned out to be my body weight.

2019

I finally threw in the towel and decided I’d get the surgery. It was the only option that provided me the best and healthiest outcome In the end. I was already in a state of depression, and the only way I felt I could truly come out of it was by starting over. I deserved to give myself and my family at least that much. I put all my fears to the side and started my journey.

Stay tuned……

Lakes, Photos, Beautiful Smiles & Self – Appreciation

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Omg we had not taken professional photos since my daughter Cassidy was a newborn. I was so extremely excited about getting these photos done. This was a combination shoot for family growth, Denim’s 13th and Cassidy’s 5th birthdays.

Back then, most of the time hubbs and I did the shopping. It use to take too long getting 4 kids ready to go to the mall for 30 mins. This time we got to go shopping as a whole. I greatly enjoyed preparing for this photoshoot.

We were looking too cute in our matching outfits. We hardly ever match unless it’s a family event. We picked out this beautiful park in Jacksonville called The Jacksonville Arboretum & Gardens. We had a blast, this place was filled with so much greenery. The lakes and bridges throughout the park were gorgeous. There were plenty trees so It gave a very picturesque nature vibe.

The lakes and bridges throughout the park were gorgeous

The kids had such a great time. My photographer was able to catch so many precious moments. I loved loved loved every minute…….

Until we got them back of course. {key in the dramatic music…bumbumbuuuuuum…did it help with the suspense?? No…ok nevermind….it felt like it went}

Anyway…

Let me start with the fact that I truly loved how the photos came out, they were fabulous and my photographer did her thang! 

Now on a personal note…

We as people are always our own worst critic. When I laid eyes on these photos I think I picked out every negative thing on myself that I could think of. I had a problem with the way I looked in every photo. My face/cheeks, my belly, my butt, my arms, my boobs, my legs EVERYTHING. I hated how I saw myself. Although I knew the pictures were amazing, my viewpoint of myself was horrible.

Since having VSG I have come to appreciate these memories. They remind me everyday to never let myself go to that negative mental space again. Over the course of this journey I have learned to love this skin that I’m in.

So after I got over it I went on to order an extra large canvas to display my gorgeous family.

No matter what trials I go through I will always remain grateful that I had these moments to experience. These moments helped to create this amazingly beautiful woman I am learning about daily.

If given the opportunity to meet one’s past self, I would hug her and tell her “you got this, It will get better”. The amount of pain hidden behind the smile was crazy.